December 14, 2017

When J.J. Met Jennifer

July 23, 2015

When J.J. Met Jennifer

It is nice to know that even giants can be humble, bashful and shy. Of course most any man would be humble, bashful and shy around Jennifer Aniston.

We were happy to learn that the best player in football, Houston Texans defensive end J.J. Watt, got all weak-kneed and googly-eyed when he recently got to meet the would-be love of his life, Ms. Aniston.

J.J. apparently has been in love with Jennifer his whole life. Many of us can say that but for J.J. it’s actually close to true because Mr. Watt was just four years old when Jennifer swooped into the hearts and dreams of American men when Friends debuted 21 years ago.

So for J.J., Jennifer Aniston is like Lynda Carter or the late, great Farrah Fawcett was for so many of us who grew up in the 1970s. But even we are who are the same age as the 46-year-old Aniston still love her but probably not as much as the guys whose first ideas of beauty were based on that smile, that hair, those eyes, and oh God this is getting creepy.

One more prurient thought: imagine Jennifer Aniston as a Houston Texans cheerleader. I am certain J.J. has.

NFL players, as I understand it, are normally not allowed to date their team’s cheerleaders but there’s a classic old photo out there somewhere in computerville that we don’t have the rights to which shows Dallas Cowboys quarterback Danny White giving a dramatic kiss to a Cowboys cheerleader after Super Bowl XII.

The Cowboys won that game so Danny deserved her affection. Being Roger Staubach’s backup, White only threw two passes in that game, completing one for five yards but (remember!?) White was also the Cowboys’ punter and booted it well that January day in New Orleans against the Broncos, five times for a 41.6-yard average.

Can you imagine in today’s NFL, which treats quarterbacks like family heirlooms, letting your backup QB be your punter? That would be like letting Jennifer Aniston co-star in an Adam Sandler movie.

How many NFL players would choose a kiss from Jennifer Aniston instead of a trip to Disney World or a new pickup truck for winning the Super Bowl? At least one.

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